Pirates of the Carribean was a fantastic franchise. Right up until the moment it went in the wrong end of a Kraken and came out with the last 2 entries.
Technically Jack jumped in at the end of Dead Man’s Chest, but you get the point.
It is the only seafaring movies set in old times, other than Master and Commander, that I watched and enjoyed.
It had the sense of adventure, great production and a great cast headed by the brilliant Depp. There was mutiny and plunder and not a small amount of comedy too.
And for the first 3 movies, there seemed to be a sense of direction too. To think, all this came from a park ride. A Disney park ride, but still a park ride.
Maybe not the Calypso becoming a literal sea-goddess bit, but it was good old-fashioned swashbuckling summer box office fun. And it translated to worldwide box office gold (doubloons).
The names Pirate Captain Jack Sparrow, Will Turner, Elizabeth Swann (alright I had to google this one) and Captain Barbosa became part of the mainstream lexicon (had to google this too).
So to celebrate this one great franchise, here are the best Pirates of the Caribbean movie props for sale right now.
It’ll be mainly replicas of props that I’m listing here because I’m not into that whole genuine article business. You should see my teeth.
Also, how does certificates of authenticity work? Who guarantees these? I watched Melissa McCarthy’s Can you ever forgive me?’.
It seemed like a good idea to start with Jack Sparrow. As much as I can, I’ll try to include Pirates of the Carribean official merchandise. Like this genuine Jack Sparrow hat. Braids not included.
It’s from Disney and it lets people know you’re a rum-drinking compass-heeding turtle-riding (oof) person who should not be allowed to play dress up after the third movie, I mean party.
But if you don’t come equipped with default braids, there’s one with braids but doesn’t look quite like Jack’s hat. A bit too leathery.
No pirate is really one without a pirate belt. Especially when carrying foam swords. Something to take the attention away from that ultra-light monstrosity.
It provides slots for guns meant for ropes and ship fittings.
A boot is essential for the look, and if official merchandise is not a necessity but practicality is, choose a pair of synthetic boots. They may be a bit too blingy for the real Jack.
But when you’re wearing a foam sword, no one’s looking at the boots friend.
Next, you’ll want the pirate outfit minus the grime. How you got the grime on can be a fun story for the party.
Frankly, I never paid attention to the coat amid all the hypnotic hand-waving.
Then there’s the gun. I didn’t find the exact one, but a decent Flintlock pistol will do for now. But if you’re hell-bent on something that looks original, you’ll have to shell out a bit for this handmade beauty.
Then we top it all off with arguably the most important piece. The compass of requirement. Jack hardly ever went anywhere without it, and when he did he was probably looking for it.
And maybe not step out without getting at least ONE of his rings.
No self-respecting pirate walks out without a distinct piece of jewelry.
Tia Dalma AKA Calypso AKA FrogHive had this necklace on. Right before she blew up into a bunch of frogs and jumped the shark.
Why am I hating on something like this on a franchise like Pirates.
Then there is the most noteworthy trinket from the first movie, Curse of the Black Pearl. The pirate medallion. What a song that was to open a franchise.
This is the medallion Elizabeth AKA Lizzie AKA Swannie, played by Keira Knightley, wore to protect Will ‘Uptight’ Turner.
Also instrumental in making the climax awesome. I feel <an eternity> cold.
But if you’re more into the second-best pirate lord, Captain Barbossa has his own line of bling. Though to be fair I can’t really recall his pendant having any significance.
And possibly beating Barbossa as the best pirate baddie was Davy Jones aboard the Flying Dutchman, played by the spectacular Bill Nighy.
He had his line of music boxes and pendants. For the lover of Krakens and keeper of island lockers.
Then his version of a pendant. The key to his heart (awww). Wait till you see his face before you go awww.
Aah, swords. I wonder if they had sword regulation laws back in the day. Sure they did. They’re sharp and makes you want to poke someone’s eye out.
And the first one to poke someone’s eye out would be Jack. It is made of stainless steel that’s been blackened for authenticity. They did not prioritize weapon hygiene.
And the first person on the receiving end on said poking would be Senor Barbossa. His swords are also provided by the same craftsman. Currently sold out.
I looked for Will Turner’s blade and did not find any. I can’t say I was severely disappointed. The man’s a wet blanket. Why would you volunteer to dress like him?
If for some reason you’ve forgotten how awesome they were, I did, make sure to check out the first 3 movies.
Not a lot of franchise starters do a good job of introducing characters well. But Curse of the Black Pearl did a great job doing it.
Straight away you knew Swann wouldn’t wear the corset for long. And that Jack was smart and untrustworthy. And that Will was a wet blanket.
They even made the Dad character interesting to an extent. Then Geoffrey Rush came along and provided the camp and cheese we did not know we needed.
Then with Dead Man’s Chest, they upped the ante in terms of stakes with the East India Trading Company and Davy Jones and a certain marine creature.
Gore Verbinski is a goddamn genius and he should’ve been given the money in the world to make a BioShock movie. Calm down …. wrong post.
If you somehow managed to miss the whole phase of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, or you watched the latest two and wondering what the fuss is about, watch the first three.
Let them wash away the bad taste of the two movies that somehow managed to stink up the joint despite having Ian McShane (as Blackbeard!), Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem join the cast.
The 4th movie, On Stranger Tides, had something to do with the fountain of youth and a Spanish Admiral doing something heroic at the end, who knows.
And it wouldn’t surprise you when I say I didn’t bother with the fifth.
And I’m sure there’ll be a new Pirates of the Carribean movie soon enough to add to the junk pile. But we’ll always have streaming services and Blu Ray.